Saturn: How Everything You You Thought You Knew Is Wrong

Why Astrologers Are Wrong About Saturn

In astrology, Saturn is traditionally considered a harbinger of all things terrible. But why? What did Saturn ever do to earn its negative reputation?

If you ask an astrologer, they will probably say something like, “In Greek mythology, Saturn was the God of Time, and eventually everything dies, so Saturn is associated with death and darkness,” or some nonsense like that.

But not only is Saturn not a planet of death, darkness, and general horror, Saturn is incredibly awesome and I’m going to tell you why!

Here are 3 reasons astrologers are wrong about Saturn.

Saturn Was Originally Ninurta, a Protector, Healer, and Farmer

Before the Greeks despoiled adopted the original astrology of ancient Mesopotamia, the planet we now know as Saturn was associated with the Babylonian deity, Ninurta.

Ninurta was a god of war, hunting, and sometimes farming. He was often depicted holding a bow and arrow (can you say ‘Sagittarius’?), and sometimes a sword or mace.

Ninurta was awesome! He was a slayer of supernatural monsters and demons. He was believed to protect people from negative spiritual entities. As you probably know, many ancient people attributed physical and mental ailments to such things; thus, via his demon-slaying, Ninurta was seen as a healer.

In ancient times, many warriors were farmers during the off-season, so it’s no surprise that when he wasn’t taking care of business hunting and killing bad guys, Ninurta was taking care of business on the farm.

So, if we’re reckoning planetary associations by evaluating mythology, then Saturn is actually a planet of: perusing your goals, accomplishing tasks, protecting and caring for your community, healing, and generally taking care of business.

Nothing scary here, but let’s move on to reason #2 just to be on the safe side.

Ninurta Became Kronus, Who Ruled Over a Planet-Wide Garden of Eden!

When the Greeks ransacked adopted Babylonian astrology, Ninurta became Kronus; most likely due to both of their associations with agriculture.

Kronus was a Titan: the son of Uranus who was the personification of the sky, and Gaia who the personification of the Earth.

In mythology, Kronus overthrew his father, but to be fair, Uranus was kind of a jerk. He hated all of his children and even forced some of them to live in darkness in Tartarus.

Fed-up with his shenanigans, Gaia forged a sickle and asked her sons to castrate their father, but none of them wanted to do it. Only Kronus was Titan enough to stand up and do the dirty deed.

Perhaps he accepted the chore out of his own ambition, or perhaps he was an eternal mamma’s boy. We can only speculate.

After neutering Uranus, Kronus took over as King of the Universe and ruled over what was termed“The Golden Age.” It was such an awesome time, the Greek poet Hesiod wrote of it:

…mortal men who lived in the time of Kronos when he was reigning in heaven. And they lived like gods without sorrow of heart, remote and free from toil: miserable age rested not on them… They dwelt in ease and peace upon their lands with many good things..

Wow, that sounds awesome!

Yes, Kronus’ Golden Age was a time where humans lived in harmony with the Earth, which bore fruit spontaneously without any effort on mankind’s part. It was a time when human beings lived free, without laws, without punishment, without any type of sadness touching their hearts. People didn’t even grow old or die.

That’s right: Kronus’ Golden Age was a global Garden of Eden!

So, it’s really no surprise that when he heard that his kids were planning to overthrow him, he ate them. I mean, can you blame the guy? Everything is going good, people are happy, the Earth is in as Ovid put it, “a season of everlasting spring.”

He had to eat the kiddies; it was for the greater good!

And even after he swallowed them, it’s not like they died. They just kind of hung out in his stomach for a while; all except for Zeus, who had been swapped at birth for a sack of rocks and raised on the island of Crete. He later gutted Kronus, releasing his brothers and sisters, who were no worse for wear.

And then all Hell broke loose. The Golden Age was over and people fell into vice and suffering.

So, if we’re determining planetary associations based on the Greek mythology that was superimposed onto Babylonian astrology, then Saturn is actually a planet of: helping your family, standing up to tyranny, accepting the hard tasks that nobody else wants, completing your mission, achieving greatness, exercising authority, successful management, and general peace and prosperity.

Nothing scary about that; but the scary stuff’s got to be in here somewhere, right?

Let’s dig just a little bit more and see if we can find it!

Kronus Became Saturn, A.K.A. “Father Christmas!”

Eventually, the Roman empire took over for the Greek Empire, and Greek mythology was integrated into the Roman religion. The Roman equivalent of Kronus was Saturn. Like his Greek counterpart, Saturn was associated with general awesomeness.

Saturn was so awesome in fact, that his festival Saturnalia was full of joyous, drunken marry-making! It was such a jolly holiday that when Christianity took over for Paganism as the state religion in Rome, many of Saturnalia’s traditions were carried over to the holiday which celebrates Jesus of Nazareth’s birthday; a holiday better known as Christmas.

Both singing in the streets (caroling), and gift-giving are carry-overs from this Pagan holiday, as is the chosen date of Christ’s birth, December 25th.

So, What In Hades Happened?

In Roman mythology, Saturn had two wives: Ops, an earthy fertility deity who distributed food and bounty to the masses; and Lua… who got to collect all the bloodied weapons from the dead after a battle. Fun.

As you can imagine, Lua was associated with destruction, endings, and general not-good-ness. This seems to be the first real appearance of Saturn’s malefic associations. But these weren’t Saturn’s traits, they were Lua’s.

Somehow, through the magic of oral transmission, the God of Peace, Prosperity, and Abundance got stuck with the bloody weapon image.

Later, Saturn was also slapped with the association of time. Again, through the magic of making-stuff-up-as-you-go-along, people got hung up on the death aspect of time (which is actually kind of stupid considering that during Kronus’ rule, people didn’t age or die). They even began associating Kronus’ Scythe with reaping, or rather: cutting people down when their time had come.

Never mind the fact that Kronus never once used the Scythe (which wasn’t even his – it was his mother Gaia’s) to actually kill anybody. In fact, When Kronus removed Uranus’ sky-testes, the blood it spilled created whole races of giants and nymphs, and even the Furies. And, when the sky-scrotum landed in the sea, it created Aphrodite.

Freaking Aphrodite!

Thus, we see Saturn’s Scythe is a tool of creation, not death!

The Moral Of The Story

Astrologers don’t like to play by their own rules. They use mythology as the basis of their predictions and interpretations, but only the corrupted version of the mythology that has been passed down over the last 2,000 years.

Very few astrologers know or care about the real origins of their science. If they did, they probably wouldn’t be using the Tropical Zodiac, but I digress.

Saturn Isn’t Malefic – It’s Awesome!

Saturn isn’t scary. It’s not a planet of death. It might be a planet of change, but that’s not something to fear; everything in existence is in a constant state of change.

You should never be afraid of Saturn, or any other planet. Astrological energies are neutral, and until astrologers admit this, the field as a whole will continue to suffer.

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